Under a Louisiana Moon
by roseredsdesire
Summary: Imagine if Alice had a secret, vision, one that could destroy her family forever. That she had always loved Bella even before she had met her. Now a month before Bella's wedding, she is reminded, will she break her silent promise to herself? *ON HOLD*
1. Chapter 1: Ignorance is Bliss

**Here are just a few thoughts, thank you to my wonderful beta, Jocelyn Torrent for making my story into something worthy of your time. To my love, here is a little story for your pleasure, as I promised. To everyone else as we all know Alice and Bella belong to Stephenie Meyer, and I am borrowing them only for my own enjoyment and yours. Basically this story takes place before Breaking Dawn, taking Alice on a quest for a past that will affect her future. When a vision she has kept a secret comes back to haunt her, what are the consequences. Begins with Bella and Edward together planning their wedding, but have no worries. I have every intention of Alice's feelings for Bella coming into play quite soon. I hope you all enjoy reading it as much as I've loved writing it. So now without further ado…**

**Chapter 1 Ignorance is Bliss**

The young women looked out the window at the falling rain as it traced slow ribbons down the cold glass. She laid her own forehead against the pane and wished for one moment to be human. That her own tears would flow in her own bitter grief, and haunt her no more. She could just feel the stinging sensation of the tears unable to fall. Her golden eyes, pure reflections of the misery she couldn't forget. She was living a lie.

Alice turned from her window and the forest outside that reached endlessly against the gray sky. Crossing to her bed she picked up the book that not even twenty-four hours ago, she'd tried to read. The one Esme, her adopted mom, had given her as a gift. It was a vampire story and Esme had chosen it without knowing. She had ordered it on Borders online. Only as it recently had been on the best seller list and Alice had found it well written. Even worth reading and addictive through seriously lacking in accuracy.

She closed the book, knowing she'd never be able to concentrate. Not with the endless battle going on inside her mind. Looking over to the bridal magazines left by Bella the evening before, she felt a deep heaviness fill her. It was barely a month until Bella would become her sister. When she married Edward and took her rightful place in the Cullen family. Then the eternal transformation as they had promised would take place. Bella would no longer cry, or blush nor be vulnerable. Alice knew it would be then that Bella would no longer need her. She would move into the cottage Esme made as a surprise. Together into eternity she would live in happiness. Blessed in ignorance never to know, as Alice had promised herself she would never say a word.

She pondered, playing with the necklace at her throat with a delicate but absent minded air. As she pulled her sweater closer around her small but strong frame, she felt her own doubt. Encircling her like demon wolves at bay only as long as she could keep her feelings locked away. Yet each and every moment, visions of what could have been had her own fear reminding her. Had she only been brave from the beginning? No she could never destroy her family, and by telling this one secret she'd lose everything. She'd hurt Bella, her dear Bella—no, Edward's one true love. Not to mention her Jasper. The one she was supposed to love as much as he did her. When he held her in his arms every night and kissed her. Made love to her, and whispered he loved her beyond measure.

'_Ignorance is bliss,'_ Alice thought. The world goes right on turning. The wedding would come and go. She alone would know the truth. She felt the strong arms of Jasper wrap her in what should have been a romantic embrace. She let his love wash away the doubts for one more night. Turning in his arms she let him kiss her.

"I've missed you, love," he breathed as he enveloped her in a strong and safe embrace.

Alice couldn't help smiling. Jasper always missed her. Even when they'd been together since the 50's and ever since he'd understood her and been there for her. Always watching over her and protecting her. Even though as vampires they were both strong, their love was innocence, simple sweet, and safe even. Though Alice knew that she and Jasper had long ago lost their fire; if in fact she had ever had the same desire she felt whenever she just looked at Bella.

"Something wrong, Alice?" he asked.

"No, just have a lot on my mind with the wedding," she trailed off.

He kissed her once more lightly on the lips. He turned off the lights, smiled lovingly and drew her back only to gather her into his arms and carry her back to bed. Alice sighed inwardly, and looked into her Jasper's eyes. Pools of love and care, and she knew she'd forget at least for one more night. She could never tell them all she loved sweet, beautiful Bella Swan.

"I missed you too, Jasper," she sighed sadly.

Her words reverberated back across time. Time was all she had……_until the vision snapped all sensibility from her shattered soul. _


	2. Chapter 2: A Secret In Subtext

**Welcome back, everyone! I hope you all had a wonderful New Years full of fun. I worked very hard to get this chapter out to you by Monday, but sadly its Tuesday morning. Well In any case I hope that you enjoy it. I have already written chapter three and four. So look for them here later this week. I just have to have my beta look them over.**

**Chapter 2 A Secret in Subtext**

Her words reverberated back across time. Time was all she had…until the vision snapped all sensibility from her shattered soul.

_The sweetest smells as of sugar and spice…and, oh the laughter and...dancing fireflies—no, Alice saw that they were string lights-- looping down the street. Far ahead she could hear the swing, blues, jazz and Cajun music blending in the night. It caught her; and what was that pressure she felt on her hand? Looking, she found her answer. Bella and her adorable brown eyes and the look on her adoring face; something only reserved for Edward, Alice saw. She was blushing and she said quietly, "Alice, do you believe in reincarnation?" _

_Alice found herself smiling. She squeezed Bella's hand lightly and pulled her close to whisper in her ear. "Yes, my lovely Bella." _

_The evening was heavy with honeysuckle, and the stars blanketed the heavens as a moon floated across the night. _

"_Alice?"She spoke slowly. _

"_Yes, Bella?"_

"_How long have you loved me?"_

_Alice sighed contentedly. "Always, my love." _

_Bella squeezed Alice's hand then gently whispered, "I love you, too." _

The world was crashing back like waves upon a beach. Roaring in her ears as the sights and sounds faded away. Startled and panicked she found herself once more in Jaspers arms. Writhing as she tried to come back to reality, Jasper tried to calm her; he had always been able to. Not with this vision. No, Alice knew her world was getting smaller. The truth was winding its way from the shadows and its presence was going to be felt. Thinking back, Alice wasn't sure how many visions she'd had that repeated themselves. She thought it was pretty safe to bet, as she looked into Jaspers worried eyes, that this one was the first and only one she had ever had more than once. Jasper held her closer and rubbed her back, but Alice's mind was racing around. Two years before, not unlike a night this, she found herself in a dream world in a reality much better than her own. Looking then into an uncertain, unforgettable future and all in the beauty of an unnamed Angel, whom she would learn was named Bella.

"Jasper," she said softy.

He smiled down at where he cradled her in his lap. "Yes, Alice?"

"I think I need to be alone, if that's ok?"

He sighed and nodded. He knew better than to push Alice to talk about her visions. When she was ready she always shared. He laid her down then got up, brushing a wisp of her brown hair from her eyes, so lovingly it hurt Alice to look at his pained expression. When she opened her eyes, he was gone.

Alice sat back, pulling her legs up and clutching them like a life preserver. She had never let herself consider what this vision had meant even the first time. She had been terrified the first time, when she had seen Bella in a vision two years before she came to Forks. Other visions had followed, making it quite clear that she and Bella were going to be close. A panicked Alice waited in confused silence, telling no one. Then one day, she and Jasper had walked into the lunch room and there she was. Sitting with a group of other students, and she had to apply her best poker face. Edward noticed her right away. Alice remembered how intently he stared at her and how she had looked back. Just when she thought he hadn't noticed. It hadn't taken long for her to see how Edward and Bella clearly felt about each other. It hurt somewhere deep inside. Somewhere Alice had lost touch with long ago. She had told herself that she and Bella could only be friends. That her visions were subjective, obviously, but they haunted her all the same.

Months had turned to years, and the future continued to hurt. Alice tried everything she could to pretend otherwise but even her safe guards weren't working. Jasper, for example, sensed something was wrong. She had long since given up hope that Bella could ever love her. She had thought maybe when Edward had left… perhaps she would have given pause. She would have stopped and considered but she had barreled ahead falling if possible more in love then before. Alice knew deep down inside she wouldn't hurt her brother or her Bella ever and she already had someone to love. Edward had Bella, his world would crumble if she ever realized….

Alice stopped to listen as she heard the strains of music playing from upstairs. She knew it was Esme and Carlisle in the library reading. They always played classical music while they each devoured a book of their choosing. '_No sleep for the restlessness,'_ she mused. No use letting sadness seep in and drown her. She had to stop thinking. Yet it was hardly coincidence that this vision had returned again after so long. Maybe there truly was a reason. Maybe there was hope.

She went over to the window were the moon was hovering right above the mountains. She tried to think what made the vision stand out; it wasn't Bella saying she loved her. She always got obsessed with that part. What else had Bella said? It was important. It had to be. She had asked if she believed in past lives. Why would Bella ask that? Why had she never thought about it before? Suddenly she just knew, and all over her body began to tingle. As she realized that it had to do with her life before she had been turned. Back when she been human and lived and died it hadn't been all that long ago. It was a secret in subtext. The one clue to realizing Bella's love and as if she knew what it would mean. She walked over to her computer and typed in 'New Orleans.' She knew that many a voodoo queen had dabbled in the essence of past lives. She knew she could no longer hide from the truth. The lies themselves, the secrets she had kept from her family. They would tear apart her life, perhaps, if she could just find out what the vision meant. Perhaps then she might be able to move on. Or prove without a shadow of a doubt that she and Bella were destined to be. She had only one month.


	3. Chapter 3: A Curious Destiny of Souls

**Hi, everyone, so sorry for the delay, I had planned on posting this yesterday, but have been going through a lot. On another serious note, my beta that I will definitely miss, can no longer work on my story. She has explained to me that she is at present unable to assist, in correcting my story. This is unfortunate news as I have chapter four written, I just need someone to look it over for grammar, punctuation, tense, and plot points. This being said if anyone knows of a beta that would enjoy working on this story. Or they themselves would like the opportunity please message me. Your help is greatly appreciated, or I can't continue to this story. In this case if it takes a while to continue this story, let me all tell you all this loyal readers. Bella makes her first appearance in chapter four. This chapter's tentative name is Bella's Memory, and finally I begin to bring the Bella and Alice relationship into the foreground. I hope everyone had a wonderful week, TGIF *grins* and I hope you enjoy chapter 3.**

**Chapter 3 ****A Curious Destiny of Souls**

The lies themselves, the secrets she had kept from her family. They would tear apart her life. Perhaps if she could just find out what the vision meant. Perhaps, then she might be able to move on. Or prove without a shadow of a doubt that she and Bella were destined to be. She had only one month___**. **_

Getting up from her place on the bed, Alice became determined to find all the answers to the riddles of the mind. Slowly, she followed the music, coming from the converted attic to the back stairs. She quickly took the steps, knowing that in the library she might be able to find some answers. Looking into the library, she saw Esme sitting comfortably on the sofa, engrossed in reading. Carlisle was in a recliner, a large book in hand and a serious look on his sensitive face. Ever so slowly she pushed the door open, not wanting to disturb either.

"Alice," Carlisle said, smiling, "what a pleasant surprise."

Esme put her book down and nodded.

"What brings you to the library at this hour?" Carlisle asked.

"Did you finish the book I gave you?" Esme wondered.

"Oh no," Alice said. "I barley started it. I'm actually here for research."

"Ah," Carlisle acknowledged. "Anything we can help you with?"

Alice bit her lip and considered if she should just ask them if there were any books on reincarnation in the shelves or just spend hours looking.

"Alice?" Esme said softly, "is anything wrong? Does this have to do with a vision? Jasper was up here a while ago. He seemed upset. Is everything ok?"

Alice shook her head; she could see the concern in Esme's eyes. She decided that maybe she should just ask. "Everything is fine," she said. Before anyone could say another word she continued. "I was thinking about past lives actually."

Carlisle closed his book with an interested smile. Leaning forward he said "well, that's a topic I haven't heard mentioned in a while. Is there any reason why you're thinking about reincarnation?"

"Um well," Alice said slowly, "I've been thinking, how do you know you're meant to be with someone?"

Carlisle and Esme watched as Alice rung her hands and tired to remain calm. She looked to the entire world like she was scared.

"Well…" Esme cautiously said it looked like she might have had more to say but Carlisle put up and hand.

"Alice, does this have to do with Bella and Edward's wedding and his resistance to turn her?"

Alice found herself saying, "Yes, I was just thinking about souls, and Edward thinks once he turns Bella. She will lose her…"

"Soul," Esme finished.

"Yes, exactly," Alice said, hating that once more she was lying.

"I see," Carlisle continued. "Well as to Bella and Edwards's destiny, I can't say. She is very young. As you know, we love Bella as our daughter. I do believe that if Edward would have agreed to her request without the wedding. She wouldn't have rushed into this wedding plan." He sighed. "Alice, you know better than both of us the future is changeable."

Esme looked to her husband and back to Alice, feeling there was an important piece of this puzzle Alice wasn't saying.

"I knew the moment I met Esme," Carlisle continued, "we were meant to be. I felt very strongly we had both a future and a past. I didn't hesitate for a moment. I did what I had to do to give her the chance to live. To give us a chance to live our destiny," he said, looking lovingly at Esme. "As far as reincarnation goes, we have a few books on it. Over here on this shelf," he indicated.

Alice smiled woodenly, trying not to think of Bella. Nodding, she said, "Thanks, Carlisle."

"If you need any more help, dear," Esme said, "just ask."

Alice nodded again and went over to the shelf Carlisle had indicated. In and among the books, she found one called Destiny of Souls by a one Michael Newton. Feeling this book might be fate she took it over to a comfy chair and turned on a reading lamp. She wasn't sure how long she sat there reading. Yet before she knew it, she was on the last page. Even more confused than before, more full of desire.

"Did you find what you were looking for?" Carlisle asked.

"Well, maybe… I'm not sure," Alice said.

"Not to change the subject," Esme said, "but I just remembered that Rosalie and I were talking about a possible vacation. We thought it might be like a bachelorette party for Bella, Carlisle has already agreed to take the Edward, Jasper and Emmett camping. It would be just us, you, me, Rosalie and Bella.

Alice felt panic rushing through her veins, knowing before Esme said anything else what was coming next.

"We thought it might be fun to go to New Orleans," she said, smiling brightly. "It's so full of history; maybe you'd find the answers you're looking for there too."

Alice would say later, that fate and destiny were something beyond anyone's control. In that instant she knew Esme had given her a sign. She knew had she been human she would have blushed. Her heart would have been racing, knowing that although the future was subject to change. Perhaps, just perhaps one couldn't escape their destiny.

"New Orleans," she said slowly. Time had finally caught up with her. All the lies were going to be all for naught. If she chose to go to New Orleans could her future and Bella's be changed? What would it do to their family, to Jasper? If she refused, would she have denied the most precious gift? Was the act of loving Bella a risk worth taking, and without further thought, she realized. So saying, brightly and smiling perhaps truly for the first time in months. "Sounds fantastic, Esme what a wonderful idea; I'm sure Bella will love it!"

Esme went over and picked up her laptop from the table by the window. She typed something into and said, "Ok, this coming week looks overcast, storms coming. If we fly out of Seattle, say Friday, we would be back in time for Bella's graduation the following Friday." She was all excited with vacation plans. "You and Bella can go shopping tomorrow after school. It's the last day, of classes didn't you say?"

"Oh yes," Alice said. "Well I think I'm going to go down to my room and maybe watch some TV."

"Ok, dear," Esme said. "I am going to keep planning the trip. I can't tell you how exciting this all is. I can feel it's going to be a trip to remember."

"Oh I'm sure of it," Alice said.

As quickly as she had come she breezed out the door. Leaving Esme and Carlisle alone in the library, save the music.

"Carlisle," Esme hesitated, "do you think maybe there is something bothering Alice?"

Carlisle looked up from his book again. He sighed sadly. "I think there has been something on her mind for a while. Jasper is right; however, when she's ready she'll come to us. She always does."

Esme looked out the window at the lightening sky, and wondered why Alice always seemed so sad. Almost like she had a secret, a secret love?


	4. Chapter 4: Bella

**Hi, y'all…sorry for the delay, I hated to keep you waiting to see what happened next. Thankfully, here for your enjoyment is chapter four. I hope that you all love it. I started writing chapter five; I hope to have it up sometime next week. I'd hate to disappoint you. This chapter is just a little about Alice, though mostly Bella before their vacation. Though I think it's very important to the over all story, because it gives us a look into what Bella is feeling. A big thank you to my new beta FrozenFire676, you're the best for taking your time to assist me in my hour of need. Now for your pleasure,**

**Chapter 4 Bella's Memory**

**Part 1**

Alice, once more her cheerful self, headed toward her car the next morning. This fact was not lost on her family as they followed her out. It was raining cold drops, but Alice didn't even feel one. She danced airily to her new car, the canary yellow Porsche, nor being able to remember when she'd been so happy. Jasper watched with wonder, it looked as if years had fallen away from his love. Whatever could have happened to make her so joyful?

Early that morning, he had returned to her room to find her standing in front of the mirror. She was twirling and looking at herself from every angle. Her beautiful short brown hair was framing her gorgeous face. All the painful confusion of the night before had been erased. She had smiled at him, and said "what do you think?"

He had grinned finding her adorable and told her, "you're beautiful as always love."

She had bitten her lip, considering, and then nodded "thank you Jasper, I am sorry that I've been distant. I guess I just have a lot on my mind." She had said, looking back at him apologetically.

Now they were racing toward town and Alice was singing. It was mystifying to everyone, especially Alice. She couldn't wait to tell Bella about the vacation, secretly catch her eye, and daydream. She felt like she was flying home. Life felt sweet and real, and the smile that spread across her face, well, it couldn't be stopped by a little rain.

**Part 2**

Across town, the subject of Alice's desire filled thoughts stood in front of her mirror, frustrated, and without a single clue as of what to wear. She pushed her long brown hair back, behind her shoulders. Starring daggers as if she was willing the mirror it to create the perfect outfit_ hopeless, _she though.

_Isn't there anything in this closet to set apart every other day from the last day of my senior year?_

She knew deep down inside she was trying to impress Edward. He had seen her in every single outfit she owned, and today should be different. She signed inwardly; she was so tired of being ordinary. Being vulnerable, human and always needing to be taken care of. She turned to the bridal magazines on the shelf. Sometimes she couldn't believe she was getting married in only a few weeks. It was all very exciting and scary.

Sighing, she remembered Jacob, who after the proposal had disappeared. She couldn't help wishing that his love for her wasn't so complete and so deep. It broke her heart to think that he was wondering out there in the woods without a friend. She felt confused and unhappy that her Jacob couldn't be happy for her. No, he was too angry that she wanted to become a vampire like the Cullen's. What an impossible situation she found herself in. She couldn't continue to live without Edward, and of course Alice. Alice was her best friend.

She turned to the clock, Edward would be over soon. She went to the closet and found a pretty top, with lace eyelets that Alice had gotten her. Here was something she hadn't worn before. She grabbed a pair of skinny jeans. Looking back into the mirror, she had to admit she did look pretty. Alice would be pleased to see her wear this shirt. She smiled pleasantly. She had to admit she honestly didn't know what she would do without Alice. She had become so much her solace and strength. More like a sister then a friend. Well no, maybe not a sister. She blushed suddenly when she thought of a shopping trip where she and Alice had gone to Seattle. Alice had explained that the best place for Bella to get a Wedding dress was NYC, but Bella had absolutely refused a trip to New York, so Alice had said 'then I guess we go to Seattle.'

Bella had found herself trying on countless dresses, each one seemingly more beautiful than the last. It had been fun, also, to watch Alice's reaction out of the corner of her eye. Alice had been full of complements that day, telling Bella how beautiful she was and how gorgeous a bride she was going to be. Even so, Bella had noticed how Alice's smile had been forced. As if she was trying very hard to smile; especially whenever Edward's name was brought up. Finally, Bella had thrown caution to the wind.

"Alice" she had said "here try on this dress, I know you love dressing me up," she had giggled and said, "now it's my turn!"

Alice had laughed. Her eyes had seemed sad but there wasn't any of the bitterness in her smile.

Bella remembered how Alice had come out of the dressing room. She had been utterly breathtaking. She couldn't have stopped herself, had she tired, from starring. Both women had stood side by side in the mirror. Bella in the vanilla wedding dress and Alice in her shorter white, elegant dress; in those moments Bella couldn't stop her mind from racing.

"Alice" she had asked casually.

"Yes Bella?"

"Did you wear a wedding dress when you married Jasper?"

She shook her head, "No, I actually never had a wedding."

"Oh" Bella had found herself losing her voice. "Did you ever want one?"

Alice had turned to face her with a sad smile" I've always wanted to have a wedding, if, I guess, the person I loved asked me."

Bella remembered her face turning red with the embarrassing realization that Alice hadn't meant Jasper.

Without another word Alice had squeezed her hand and gone to change.

Now remembering that afternoon, from the comfort of her mirror she realized why she had blushed at the memory. She had thought then how perfect they looked together. She had wanted to tell Alice at that moment how beautiful she was. She had wanted to kiss Alice's cheek, and had been regretful when Alice let go of her hand. Bella blushed more, realizing that she hadn't wanted Alice to let go. It was the strangest memory, and yet with Alice she had to admit; perhaps there was anyways something mysterious about her.

"Don't you look beautiful" Edward said from the doorway as he swept into the room, embracing her, and kissing her forehead.

Bella blushed crimson at Edward finding her thinking about his sister. She wasn't thankful for the first time that he couldn't read her mind.

"Ready to go love?" he said smiling. "Alice can't wait to see you! We better hurry; she has a surprise for you."

"Oh no Edward" Bella said "oh no not another of Alice's crazy surprises."

Edward took her hand and led her out to the car. "A surprise is a surprise Bell; I think this time you're actually going to like what we have planned." As he car started and they began the 10 minute drive to school Bella found she was once more dreaming about a white wedding dress, and Alice.


	5. Chapter 5:Trusting a giant leap of Faith

**Wow, ya'll so sorry that I've been delayed in writing for such a delayed amount of time!!! Things have been so busy for me since I am a junior in college, even more so since I just moved! The apartment I was in wasn't working out so I broke the license. With that an a multitude of other issues just to mention another my computers both crashed and so I didn't have access to any way to write. My internet was supposed to be set up today, but that didn't happen. Our family's cat passed away, too and my relationship experienced a fall out that destroyed my inspiration. With those things said, I've finally been inspired to deliver for your enjoyment another chapter! I hope that ya'll love it, we now get to see Bella really question herself about how she is feeling. As always thank you to my beta that has helped to bring the best of me! I hope everyone has a wonderful week, and I look forward to hearing what you all think. Don't forget to look for an all new chapter sometime next week, if everything works out! **

**Chapter 5: Trusting a giant leap of Faith **

From the moment that Bella entered the school her mind wasn't fully there. She kept replaying her day dreams about white wedding dresses all through class and wondering what Alice was doing. Then she would berate herself for even caring what her best friend was up to. She tried to make herself think of Edward, but her mind just didn't cooperate.

She kept thinking about Alice's confession about wanting to be married herself. What could she have meant when she said, '_I've always wanted to have a wedding, if I guess the person I loved asked me'_? She hadn't meant Jasper. Did Alice have a secret love? Bella's cheeks began to burn with these thoughts, and she wondered why she cared if Alice had a secret. If Alice, who always treated her as her best friend, really cared wouldn't she have confided in her?

As she was leaning against her locker becoming frustrated, confused and maybe even angry with herself for carrying so much Alice appeared at her side. The pixie then proceeded to invade her thoughts, with vacation plans.

"Bella pleeeease…" she playfully asked. " I've seen it already; you know I am going to get my way."

Alice couldn't stop jumping, and she dragged Bella right along with her in excitement, her golden eyes dancing with mischievous laughter as a smile tugged at her lips.

Bella tired to ignore the cool sensation on her hands and the growing pain her stomach that was caused by getting dragged around by Alice. What was worse, though, was Alice saying that she saw her agreeing to go. Didn't that mean that she had a vision? Bella couldn't imagine how this vacation could be so important that it was making her best friend act in such a manner. Yet, as Bella knew, Alice often got worked up over her crazy ideas. For Alice, big was best and fashionable was necessary, and this seemed to be one of those times.

"Alice!" Bella pleaded "calm down your making my stomach sick pulling me around like this."

Alice stopped jumping immediately and sighed. She couldn't bear the thought of hurting her Bella. A frown spread across her face as she convinced herself to stop thinking about her like that. Bella wasn't hers.

Bella watched Alice's joy evaporate like smoke as something flickered behind her eyes, but it was gone to quickly for Bella to be sure what is was. Alice's vacation just made her more confused, so in frustration she began to bite her lip. How would she go away on a vacation without Edward? How could she be with Alice for a week in New Orleans? What if something happened and Alice had a vision about all the thoughts she'd been day dreaming about. The scary thing was, she wished Alice could figure it out and convince her not get married so young. Her heart began to race faster. She knew she really didn't want to disappoint Alice.

Alice watched the adorable way that Bella nibbled at her bottom lip. She was trying so hard to think, Alice knew. Bella always chewed at her lip when she was thinking. From her body language, Alice knew she was trying hard not to disappoint anyone. She sighed again and reached gently for Bella's hand. Meaning it only as a sensitive, caring sign to encourage Bella, and perhaps, help put her at ease Alice enclosed her cold hand with Bella's warm one.

With surprise, Bella's clear brown eyes locked with warm honey ones, mystified at this simple touch. Her cheeks began to color, Alice noticed, from her embarrassment at being touched; or was Bella realizing her true feelings? Breaking eye contact too quickly Bella turned away and leaned back into Edward's ever present arms. He had just appeared, like Alice, as if by magic behind her and Bella could feel his protective arms wrap around from behind. As soon as she felt his strong arms and their familiarity her cheeks returned to their accustomed color.

"Alice" he said in a warning voice. Bella could clearly feel his confusion as he clutched at her as if she would disappear.

If Alice had been human she knew she would have blushed a deep crimson at the realization that she had just openly touched Bella. It might have appeared as nothing but a friendly, sisterly touch save it for her expression and Bella's reaction, it could only be loaded with subtext. As her hurt from Edwards's attitude betrayed her true feeling, it was with a scowl that she drew back.

In hopes of defusing the tension Alice barreled on saying, "Esme and Rose are coming too!"

'_Fantastic' _Bella thought as she painted a picture of her and Rose on a plan together and mumbled something under her breath.

"Oh Bella, stop being so difficult it's just what we need!" Alice continued. Spending a week with Esme was easy; she was very sweet and lovable. Rose was another story. It wasn't that Bella didn't like her; it just seemed that Rose strongly disliked her.

"Rose doesn't hate you Bella," Alice continued as if she had read Bella's mind, "you know she doesn't, she just thinks you should enjoy being human."

'_And not want to be a vampire'._ Bella thought.

Bella found herself, once again, thankful for the fact that even though Edward could read everyone else's mind quite easily, hers remained sealed from him. Her heartbeat raced even faster at the thought of Edward realizing how wonderful holding Alice's hand in hers had been. It was something that simply shouldn't be; she shouldn't feel that way about her best friend. Even more upsetting was how it reminded her of that day in the bridal shop, again.

In her fear she tried to look anywhere but into Alice's eyes feeling they would betray her confused feelings. She closed her them and thought of barring her head in Edward's shoulder, but when she opened her eyes once more it was only to see Alice's warm golden ones. Bella gulped thinking Alice might be able to see right through her, right into her mind and see the images that a moment before had crossed her thoughts.

She heard her own voice saying "Alice, you know it's not that I don't want or appreciate this vacation. It's just there is so much to plan before the wedding." She felt Edwards arm's tightening and squirmed slightly until he loosened his grip. Slowly, she tried again, "Alice a wedding doesn't just plan itself."

Alice watched Bella squirming in Edwards embrace and all her stomach wanted to o was turn in frustration. Every part of her wanted to just reach out and pull Bella away. Though she wouldn't because she knew it had to come from Bella. It had to be her own choice to open herself up to the real possibility of seeing through her heart.

As the three stood in the hall of the high school, mere minutes passed and Bella found her mind repeating the same thing over and over. '_I know it's wrong to rush our marriage, but Edward will not grant my wish without me becoming his wife. I just can't live my life without him….can I?'_

Bella sighed as she realized she couldn't have a life with Edward without marrying him. Her dream to be a part of this family couldn't be without sacrificing her life of independence, unless…..

"Bella," She heard Alice call, interrupting her train of thought. "You know Esmé' and I are way ahead on the wedding plans."

Bella found herself hesitating, her mind pushing her to agree with her best friend. Maybe if they were alone she could open and be honest about her marriage fears. Drop some hints to the real reason she was marring Edward and giving up freedom. That he wouldn't turn her into a vampire, something she desperately wanted, and something he'd never have agreed to do hadn't it been for the Voltaire. They, a powerful ruling vampire coven in Italy who would soon come to make sure this deed had been done.

Edward had made it clear that if they got married he would turn her and grant her wish. Recently, he wouldn't even be alone with her. She thought it was because he was afraid she'd change her mind and start trying to push him to turn her without the wedding.

"Bella, come on" Alice's sweet voice, intruded her thoughts. "You're not going to regret our vacation, I promise."

She shrugged, and sighed, knowing she wasn't going to be dissuaded. "Oh fine," Bella said, trying to keep her enthusiasm from her quivering voice.

"Yay!" Alice squealed, "Oh Bella you're going to love New Orleans. We leave after finals and we'll be back in time for graduation." Alice started to dance in the hall, not caring what others were going to think. Her vision could really come true, as long as she didn't blow it. Didn't push her love, she might actually be able to show Bella how much she truly care about her. They would finally be away from the prying eyes of Edward. She couldn't believe she was doing this. Inside, again, she knew she owed it to herself and Bella to figure out what her vision met.

Bella felt her cheeks begin color again at the realization that in just a few days she would be with Alice and the other Cullen women. She smiled faintly back at Alice and nodded. She didn't even notice when she had gotten into her truck.

As Edward drove her home that day she couldn't keep focused. What if Edward figured out why she had really agreed to Alice?

"Bell's," Edward called her from her confusion, "We're home. I'll be back later; I am going to do some hunting. I am glad you agreed, though, you and Alice will have so much fun in New Orleans."

Looking back at him blankly the meaning of his words began sink in. Bella nodded, absently opening the car door. Quickly he wrapped her in a hug and kissed her, but she found herself unable to return it with passion, as she once had. If he noticed he didn't mention it. Before she could say a word he was gone; leaving her to thoughts of Alice once more.

As she opened the door her cell rang. It was Alice, and Bella couldn't help but feel her hands begin to shake. '_Stop'_ she thought '_why you are letting your feelings get all confused, she is your best friend'._

"We have to go shopping Bella," Alice chirped into the phone. "I'll pick you up in an hour!"

Bella felt herself grinning even as her heart raced again and her cheeks turned crimson at the thought of spending an afternoon alone with Alice. She knew without a doubt it wasn't fare to Edward. She had to figure out why she was feeling things for his sister that she shouldn't.

"Ok," she found herself saying, even letting the delight into her voice. "I'll be ready!"

"I'll be there soon," Alice said as she closed her phone and smiled wryly. Bella hadn't fought her about shopping. Something was definitely happening and she couldn't wait to see her Bella again.


	6. Chapter 6: A Lyrical Secret Reveled

**Hey ya'll; sorry for yet another delay in the posting of this story! I tired yesterday, but for some reason I just couldn't get it work! Anyway; if ya'll are reading it then it finally posted! I hope so because I've been very excited for the release of this chapter. It was so much fun to write and the internal terminal of Bella is classic and there are so some funny parts too. I even got to put a little of myself in here. I hope that ya'll enjoy it and are looking forward to chapter seven were we finally jet off to New Orleans. I always love feedback so review anything and let me know. As always thank you to my wonderful beta, Sara I couldn't have done this without you! It's such a pleasure to write this story and for ya'll….so read and enjoy : ) **

**Chapter 6: A Lyrical Secret reveled**

Bella was out the door almost too quickly as Alice pulled into the drive way. Tripping over the bottom of the step, Alice appeared and caught her, laughing and saying smugly. "Wow Bella you must be really happy to see me!"

Bella managed to smile; words lost to her as she felt Alice's arms around her, keeping her safe from hitting the ground. She knew if she tried to speak the words wouldn't have come.

An hour had passed and both girls, neither aware of the others thoughts; where both thinking about this shopping trip together with delight. Bella had felt her stomach clenching with nerves of apprehension as she had waited for Alice to arrive. Never before had she been this nervous; not even when she first met Edward, and later when she realized her feelings for him.

_'What's wrong with me' _she had thought over and over again before Alice had arrived, all the while looking at the clock over the mantel and counting down the minutes till the yellow Porsche would pull into her drive.

Her cheeks colored as Alice set her back on her feet. "Ready to go Bells?" she said sweetly. Bella felt herself nodding.

Alice opened the car door and Bella slide in. In a blink Alice was behind the wheel and they were on their way. When Bella felt herself able to speak she whispered, "where are we going Alice?"

Alice grinned devilishly "Seattle"

Bella started to speak but Alice cut her off, "I called Charlie earlier and asked him if it was ok. I told him why and he agreed we needed to get you something special for your trip!"

Bella leaned back into the seat and closed her eyes; Alice never ceased to amaze. She was always one step ahead. As the trees blurred past Bella felt her mind begin drifted away. Alice was a careful and safe driver, never once did Bella feel venerable with her.

Alice looked over and saw her love had fallen asleep. Her eyes were closed and her hair had fallen down around her face. She looked like a porcelain angel with her cheeks pale and rosy. Everything about Bella was perfect. Alice sighed in contentment as the sounds of Bella's heartbeat flowed into her ears. Slowly taking her eyes away to pay attention to the road she turned on the stereo and begins looking for a special CD. Finding it the smile Alice was trying to hind breaks free, broadening as the music begins to play and she sings along.

Bella opens her eyes to see Alice singing along with someone familiar, strangely familiar; then she laughs…. "Alice is that Miley Cyrus you're playing?"

Alice looks over, sees Bella has woken up, and smirks. She suddenly has a really devious idea. Before talking herself out of it she just follows her heart. "Well yes Bella it is, didn't I ever tell you I was a big fan of hers?"

"No" Bella returns, a bemused smile on her face.

"Well I am" Alice continues.

"Oh"

"Don't you want to know why?" Alice chirps having a lot of fun thinking about what she is going to say next. She doesn't take her eyes off the road because she needs to keep her voice serious, but casual as well; like she is just telling Bella what book she is reading.

"Oh, umh sure" Bella says curiously. She hasn't ever heard Alice play Miley Cyrus before. She continues by saying, half to herself. "Miley is she like you're guilty pleasure or something?" Suddenly realizing how that sounded Bella blushed crimson. "I mean…"

"Oh you could say that" Alice says, a smug smile on her face.

"I know what you meant Bell's." she continued, "No need to be embarrassed, I believe she has a beautiful voice and is equally gorgeous." Alice waited for this to sink in as she listened to Miley's voice fill the car. When she felt she had taken enough of a dramatic pause her smile turned from smug to mischievous. Bella looked over at her and felt her heart begin to race.

"You think Miley is beautiful?" Bella gulped.

_'Why should it matter if she thinks a singer is beautiful doesn't mean she would ever think I was…whoah! Where did that come from Bella?' _She continued to try and calm her nerves, as Alice answered her.

"Yes very much so Bella."

" D...d...d...do you think other girls…are..?"

"Beautiful? Sometimes, depends on the girl," Alice said as she brushed a stray hair from Bella's face.

Bella found her face burning and her heart racing. _'Stop stop' _she pleaded with herself. She felt the curiosity inside her pushing her to say something. She resisted as long as she could, but in the end she just had to know.

"Alice?"

"Yes Bella?"

"You're not attracted to um..."

"Women." Alice finishes as she turns to look Bella right in the eyes. "I'd be lying if I didn't admit that sometimes I am!"

Bella can't seem to say more than 'Ooh, as she hears her mind screaming, _'did my best friend just tell me she was into girls?? Or was she talking about…_gulp... _me?'_

Alice looks over again and pretends not to notice how what she just said, has brought more color into her loves cheeks. She watches as Bella bites her lip and twists her hands in her lap. She smiles, hoping Bella's blush is brought on by her realizing that she was referring to her and not Miley.

"Does knowing this make you uncomfortable?" Alice asks cautiously, hoping she didn't embarrass Bella so much that their shopping trip is ruined before it even begins; let alone the vacation and any possibility her vision. She scowls to herself knowing this all has to come from Bella. She had just thrown a line out to see. No harm in that.

"No, it's ok Alice. I just wonder why you never, um, mentioned this before?"

"Oh it's not like, something I go talking about," Alice said, a little hurt by Bella's reaction. Maybe she should have said it sooner; Bella was her best friend after all.

" Oh no!" Bella found herself interrupting as she sensed the hurt Alice was feeling. Bella wasn't disturbed by Alice's confession she just wondered if they had truly been so close, the why Alice had never said a thing.

"It's ok I understand. Does Jasper k...k...n...ow?

"Oh yes Bell's, he knows I am bisexual." Alice said, pleased to have finally admitted it.

"He doesn't mind?"

"No, of course not. He thinks it's really…." Alice trails off, thinking, "Oh how do I put this delicately? He thinks it's really hot!"

Bella continues to twist her hands, wondering if Alice has always been bisexual or if it was a resent development. Were all vampires attracted to women and men? Did that mean that Edward was…'_oh wow that is soo not something I want to imagine!'_

Alice already knew what Bella was thinking and her voice came out filled with affection for her best friend. "I've been bisexual for a while, I've known for about 3 years." Her voice even surprises her as it falters "I've never been with women, but I acknowledge that certain ones are gorgeous. Like Miley."

There she just gave away one of her biggest secrets and all without coming out and telling Bella that it was her that had turned her bisexual. All because of a vision that had come two years before her eyes had ever locked with this angel beside her.

The music continues to play in the background and Alice finds herself singing along again. Their conversation momentarily over she watches Bella close her eyes and try to pretend she is asleep again.

When she looks over again, however, she notices that Bella's breathing had returned to normal and she appears to have really fallen asleep. Alice looked up to the sign that flashed just by the window. Seattle was less than hour away and then their shopping trip could begin. She let another smile light up her face. This was going to be an interesting vacation.

From her side of the car, Bella faked sleep and allowed images that scared her to play around the edges of her subconscious. Images of Alice kissing another girl. First she imaged it happening in front of Jasper. Then she imagined it happened and led to other things away from him, on Alice's bed. Bella imagined this girl was Miley at first. Her stomach turned over and over. Then she felt herself falling, her breath hitching as she realized it wasn't Miley at all. That the girl in Alice's arms was…..

"Wake up Bella! Were here" she heard Alice say. She felt her cool hand on her forehead… "Wake up sleeping beauty, it's time to shop!"

Opening her eyes she looked into Alice's and her cheeks colored. As Alice made for the door, Bella's mind reformed. She remembered that she had been daydreaming, and must have fallen asleep. Now more confused than ever as she remembered her dream.

_'Am I falling in love with my best friend?'_


End file.
